past & present

I often find myself relating my present to the past. Especially on this amazing journey that I am on to find what really makes my heart flutter, what I cant live without, and why its THESE things that I hold dear to my heart.

Just a voice and some strings.

My dad and step mom use to play just the good old fashioned-guitar. They would have books of songs that they would sometimes allow us to make our requests. Mine, that I can remember were usually "You are my Sunshine", "This Little Light of Mine", "We Didn't Start the Fire", and "American Pie".



That's just a taste of some things I love. They'll be more to come. Trust me.

AJ

i sure didn't take this language class in school

Have you heard of the 5 Love Languages? Its this genius concept by Dr. Gary Chapman who wrote the book "The 5 Love Languages". I was blessed enough to find this as an audio book and find it very interesting.

Here is what Dr. Chapman says are "THE 5 LOVE LANGUAGES"

• Words of Affirmation-Is just how it sounds. Complements make you satisfied.




• Quality Time- Sitting in front of the TV while talking IS NOT under this category. You want to hear " I love you", you want undivided quality time with your partner.




• Receiving Gifts-This person appreciates receiving gifts. Its not just material things, it's everyday gestures that make this language thrive and satisfied. A love letter would be just fine.

• Acts of Service- The author says that "anything to ease the burden of responsibilities" is under this category. Don't break a commitment with someone who holds this quality!




• Physical Touch- Hugs, pats on the back, kissing, and holding hands all fall under "Physical Touch".

Interesting right? Dr. Chapman says that most people aren't just 1 of these categories. Most people are a few of them. I would say that I am

Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

What would you say your love languages are?

For more info on The Five Love Languages, head over to http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-the-languages/the-five-love-languages/ for details!

finding answers.

It's interesting to me, how things happen in similarities. I find it so fascinating, and it kind of makes my heart stop when it happens. It's that moment where you are looking for an answer or you just want someone to tell you what you've needed to hear. Maybe it comes in the form of lyrics to a song, maybe it is words printed onto a page of a book, OR JUST maybe it is those last words spoken on a TV show that you could barely keep your eyes open for..... but that line woke you right up as if it were screamed in your ears. That my friends, is what happened.

2011 is definitely a transition year (OK, hopefully not the whole year, maybe just the first few months!?). I have been asking myself questions as if I need to know the answer now. I have been trying to find who I am and where I want my life to go. Then, on a sleepy Monday evening I hear this......

"maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. maybe, you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be.”
Carrie Bradshaw
{Sex and the City- Anchors Away 2002}

Thank you New York's "most coveted fashionista". Thank you for an answer.

AJ

better your relationship

I often find myself cruising over to John Tesh's radio show website for his series of "Intellegence For Your Life". He covers everything from "Where germs come from", to "How volunteering makes you live longer". They have great stories over there and I'd like to share one. I am always working on bettering my relationship with my fiance'. The last thing I want, is for us to just stay at a certain level in our relationship. Just the way I feel about the way I live my life. Why not keep learning more about eachother, more about what makes a succesful marriage, and what other couples do to stay happy.

The Secrets of Happy Couples

"Most couples focus on avoiding conflict, but happy couples know to maximize the positive – even if it means a little teasing every now and then. Want to be one of those couples? Here’s how, courtesy of Psychology Today magazine.



•Poke fun at each other. Dacher Keltner is a professor of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley. He says that playfulness is one of the first casualties of a busy life. When your days consist of nothing but working, paying bills, cleaning and sleeping, play can disappear from your relationship. You have to keep it alive, by joking around and even using silly nicknames. You may think a serious talk is the best way to handle a serious situation, but Keltner says that couples who tease each other in the heat of a conflict actually feel more connected when things are resolved.

•Notice what’s new about your partner. Ellen Langer is a psychologist at Harvard University. She says that most of us get so familiar with our partners that we stop noticing them. Just because you’ve stopped looking doesn’t mean they’ve stopped changing. So, make it a point to detect differences, and each time you do this, look for three things about your partner that have changed since the last time you looked. Langer calls this “mindful awareness.” She points to one study which found that when non-football fans watched a game while writing down things they noticed about the players and the stadium, they became more enthusiastic about the sport.

•Put it in writing. A study from the University of Texas found that when couples wrote about their relationship for 20 minutes a day, three days a week, they were more likely to be going strong three years later. They also sent more positive instant messages. So, the next time you think fondly about your partner, write it down. Even better - share what you wrote with them."

Off I go, to write my fiance' a love letter.

Head over to http://www.tesh.com/ for more stories and studies that will make you a better person.

To: Me. By: Me

As you will learn about me during this blog-excursion, (and maybe even learn about yourself) I am inspired by so many things around me. I tend to analyze my inspirations. It's not very often that I find the inspiration that the source was meant to have. I find it in my own, and tailor it to MY life and how I WANT to be inspired.

Now I introduce to you this song. I blast it in my car or on my iPod when I need a boost. I use it as a song I would sing to myself. Nobody is singing it to me, no one is dedicating it me, it's perfectly {To: me, By: me}. *Just the video itself is heaven as well!

every move you make. every step you take.

With an (almost) perfected skill of not making time to take care of myself and my responsibilities I have learned to fit random acts into my day. The rush of the world and my passion to make the best person I can be out of myself, makes it difficult to work out these days. I use to enjoy the gym (and when I DO go, I still enjoy it). But to take the time out of having an evening in with my fiance' or doing laundry, cleaning the house, or just relaxing; to go to the gym seems like such a burden. Anyone else feel this?

I have learned to squeeze some exercises in while, say...... blow drying my hair or driving to work.

Here are a couple little work outs to mix into the madness of your day!

{double shot of stairs} This is so simple and I hear other people do it too! (It's not just me looking kinda silly). Here's how it goes. Instead of stepping onto each stair, step onto every other! Done. Do this on every set of stairs you walk up. When I'm at home cleaning house, this exercises gets a lot of practice.

{a side of hair drying}As I blow dry my hair every (other) morning or flat iron it, I will do side-bends. Also holding in your hips and just going side to side with your upper body helps tone in your midsection and abs! I'll do about 20 bends on each side. Sometimes I'll throw in some squats if I'm really feeling motivated! :)


{shower squats} Sounds weird, I know. As I'm washing my hair in the shower I do my squats. Might as well make the most of your only alone time during the day.

{all about the bend} Every chance I get, every move that I can, I try to do it as a dancer would. I probably look stupid, so I do it when I am alone. BUT I LOVE THIS! When I bend to pick something up I extend one leg up and out. If I am reaching over to get something I reach from my waist. I always try to inhale and exhale my movements especially when it comes to my back.

{driving the stretch} In the car I keep it pretty simple. This is almost more of my Yoga time. I work on my breathing, my wrist stretches, neck stretches and shoulder stretches. Breathing will help you relax in the commute as well as opening up your lungs and get your blood flowing for a healthy start to the day. It's funny, I notice that breathing is really the last thing a lot of people overlook when it comes to working out and taking care of yourself. It releases stress and loosens up your muscles. Drive time is an easy place to concentrate on this practice. (Tip: turn of the radio to really focus)

Is there something that YOU do, that makes you feel content when you don't have time for your fitness routine?

risky business.

It's 2011. A new decade. Let's take some risks.

With a new career move in the works, a new season on its way, and well... longer hair :) what better time to jump outside of the box, and explore new opportunities!? So with Spring just around the corner Im ready to amp up my lip color! (I know, Im one crazy risk taker.)

How amazing is a hot pink lip? It's a 'POP' of pop culture with a garnish of playfulness. It's Barbie's pink corvette and Betsy Johnson's entire colllection. L.O.V.E, that's all.

Orange. Aww, my current obsession on lips and cheeks. It screams "Spring!" and looks fabulous on a variety of skin tones. Don't want to buy a new blush to complement? Dab a bit of any coral/orange lipstick on the back of your hand and use your fingertips or creme brush to apply to the apples of your cheeks as a creme blush. Look at you, Georgia Peach!

Mmm, a red lip. It's timeless, feminine, and sassy. One suggestion for this look, take your skin tone into consideration. Do you choose a warm undertone (orange) , or a cool undertone(blue)? This makes all the difference.

Hmmm, what shall be on tomorrow's LIP MENU?

Graze over some great tips and suggestions with these colors at Harpers Bazaar online.
http://www.harpersbazaar/.com/beauty/makeup-articles/spring-beauty-looks-0211#fbIndex1

A

what will you be feeding yourself and your family today?

Huge fan/supporter of what Jamie Oliver preaches. He's genious. But not really. He just talks common sense. Let's make a change people.
Watch Jamie lay it out for you.

dear {creative} self

Dear Creative Self,
It has been too long. You have been so distant and I dream about you often.

You were in overdrive there for a while, and I long for you to regroup and get back to your creative self. It's ok. We all need a break. So do what it takes to get inspired. Draw something, glue something, cut something, create something.

Start with creating a space to let your ideas flow. (Just ignore the pink and blue 80's wallpaper behind your desk. Or not. Work with it till you can slap on a new background to your creative space).

I found some plain ol' clip boards for you to start your (VERY INEXPENSIVE, yet sorta chic) inspiration board. Go ahead. Get inspired.

Head over to "a beautiful mess" for more inspiration.
http://abeautifulmess.typepad.com/my_weblog/

Till we meet again.

A

tuesday's {to do list}

If {putting things off} were a sport, I am pretty sure I'd be an Olympic Gold Medalist. Yup, my name is Adrian and I'm a procrastinate-aholic.

Today, in the midst of some side projects, I will be taking care of some chores. I know, boring blog post about chores.... BUT it gets better!

A couple of years ago I listened to a life-changing audio book titled "Take Time For Your Life" by world renowned life coach, Cheryl Richardson.

(You must visit her site http://www.cherylrichardson.com/)

I swear by this book! I could pretty much relate to every statement, in every chapter, on every page (track). One of the many amazing "aw, hah!" moments I remember most is when Cheryl was discussing a meeting she had with a client and this client had some built up anger that would be expressed every time she went into one specific room in her house. She didn't know why, because nothing bad had happened in that space and it was pretty clean and organized. EXCEPT for one box, that she had filled with papers of all sorts. It was one of those things that would linger in her mind, even if she did not realize the exact culprit of this angst. I found this story amazing. How many times do I walk by a pile of laundry that has been sitting on the dryer for a 4 days, or walk into a room that has a bag that I haven't even looked in since I set it there 3 weeks ago, or worst of all the room that became a war-zone-storage unit after months of deprivation, and feel so frustrated and angry.

{photo cred. http://www.twofoto.com/}

It's amazing what little things affect your mood and perspective without really knowing the source. Now, lets take care of some {to do list} chores for a better mood and a gratifying day!

11 powerful ways to expand your life

Who doesn't want to "expand their life"? Let's make the best out of this ride! I found this list online and became completely OB-SESSED on ways to expand my small little life.

Here is THE LIST, with my spin on it.

1. Define your future. Be sure to think BIGGER than yourself. Stretch yourself. Think without any limitations.


2. Become the person who would achieve your goals. I love this one. So often I have these great dreams, then think "I can't do this, but how does that person do it?" The author suggests spending one extra hour each day on your success goals.


3. Give more than you must. Do not just do what is expected. Go BIG or go HOME!


4. Make time for what you love. The author says "If you don't live fully, you deny the world your potential contributions". Duh people!! Embrace all that you love! (That is why I have subscriptions to like 10 magazines!)


5. Refine your Inner Circle. Let go of the people that hold you back, and connect with the ones that encourage you to live fully.


6. Resolve your unfinished business. I am SO guilty of not doing this. "Say your apologies, face your fears, pay your debts (ugh!), express your gratitude and get on with living," the author recommends. He also suggests "Don't let yesterday drain value from today and tomorrow". Now.... lets write that check to my student loan account. Blah!


7. Rethink habits and routines. Yes, please! Mix it up! Instead of sipping on coffee first thing in the am, jump outside and go for a jog.


8. Lighten up. 3 words for ya..... "GET OVER IT".


9. Tighten up. Increase your self discipline and master the art of self motivation. ASAP!


10. Profile yourself. He suggests to really get to know yourself. Know your values, your strengths and weaknesses. Pay attention to the natural reoccurances that happen in your life. It will teach you so much by acknowledging these.


11. Invest in yourself. ZING! Refine your skills, take a class, and spend time.... well, going through this whole list and writing them down. YOU are truly your only asset.

Wouldn't this be a great lesson for kids? Why try to go back and fix and adjust things? Lets teach them this NOW! I wish I had this list at say, 18.

How are you going to use this list?

http://cathcart.com/media-press/motivation-articles/11-powerful-ways-to-expand-your-life-this-year/

Real Life.

Real Life.

Up's. Downs. Good. Bad. Love. Hate.

I am always so grateful for what is thrown my way in life. If it's a negative, I do everything I can to find the positive in the situation. Not everyone does this, and it's not always easy to do of course either. But I hope this chapter in my blog inspires you to see the good out of any bad.

I find some very amazing and inspiring people in my life on a regular basis. It is amazing what unfolds when you really start to ask the Q's. That is what Real Life is.

Meet Melinda. She's as beautiful in the inside, as she is on the outside. As long as I have known her she's been such a fun spirit, a strong woman, and a fighter. She's a single mom who has put her son in a private school for the best education she can give him, and spends any free moment making memories with her only child, Aden. Not only has she accomplished being a wonderful mom she has also fought one of life's hardest battles that no one wants to ever learn to fight. Cancer. Here's her story.


"Oh geez. Weird, sometimes I think I'm over it. You know, when you're first diagnosed you're in a state of shock. Especially at the age of 32. But when I think about the moment my doctor said "It's a malignant tumor. A very aggressive cancer. You will have to go through Chemo and Radiation." I still break down. It was such a blow.

My cancer (awwww, like its my own) is called Ewing Sarcoma. Malignant Tumors.

So the first thing I do when someone talks about anything that I have little or no knowledge of, I "Google" it. With cancer I didn't. The last thing I wanted to do was scare myself more than I already was. I do know, you're born with it. It is aggressive, but highly treatable. and I do believe it is a blood cancer, so it can show up anywhere. One of the first things my Chemo Oncologist asked me was, "What do you know about your cancer?" My reply? "NOTHING". He told me, "that was good". There was nothing that I needed to know that he would not tell me. He also mentioned that there are a lot of things on the Internet that are not true. So never read about your disease or illness on the Internet. Ask your doctor.

I was diagnosed the first time June 26th, 2009 with a tumor in my left pelvic. It had actually started in my thigh bone and worked its way through my pelvic and was on its way into my left buttocks muscle.

The second diagnosis was Sept 15th 2010. I had a screaming migraine on August 29th. It lasted for 2 days, then a steady headache for about 2 weeks. I came home from work on a Friday night and within an hour my vision was double. The following Monday Sept 13th I went to the emergency room and it was a tumor, behind my right eye. It was putting so much pressure on the outside nerve it was causing paralization to my right eye. My eye was so turned-in you could barley see it. I wore a patch for 6 weeks just so I could see straight. Arg!

Ive learned to be thankful. Thankful that I had the best Oncologist ever. Thankful that I was able to get to my treatments when scheduled. Thankful that I have such a wonderful boss that told me he'd hire a temp, but to do what I had to do for myself and for Aden (my son) to get well. My relationship with my family is so much stronger now, after going through this as well.

{photo cred Dena Brender}

I haven't had any symptoms since I finished radiation at the end of October 2010. I actually have a PT Scan scheduled for tomorrow morning (Tuesday February 8th), so we shall see. ;)

I think one of the main thing this has taught me, is that beauty IS only skin deep. Being a girl who was so concerned about her hair, makeup, eyebrows and eyelashes, and I wouldn't ever go out without being perfectly primped, and then losing it ALL was a very humbling experience! I wore wigs, and drew my eyebrows on and wore fake eyelashes or just applied heavy eyeliner and no one could tell. But stepping out of the shower with my head so bald it was shiny and NO eyebrows or eyelashes, was definitely a shock. Knock on wood its all back now, and hopefully this time, it's here to stay."

{Thank you Melinda, for being an inspiration and a fighter. You rock girlfriend!}

she answered. ok, no she didn't

After my last post, I decided to take my own advice (baby steps of course).

{Asking yourself the hard questions}. Wow. I thought "sure, 5 questions or so and I'll have it all figured out". Oh, Adrian... YOU have so much to learn on this journey.

About 30 questions rambled off my mind. If it wasn't for the refill I needed of my peppermint tea, I easily could have kept going. I went down the list and answered the Q's that I knew the answers to right away.

What a realization of the things that sit in my mind, yet I never really think about from beginning to end. I also realized that some of the questions I had were answered by other people's opinions or motives. After finishing MY answers I went back and crossed out the answers that I wrote down as I was thinking about other people. With that being said, I have about 28 Q's to answer all over again.

Have you tried this yet?

Would love to hear how other people answer the tough Q's.

love me a photo shoot vid. {black swan}

Oh, how I OBSESS over photo shoot videos.

Natalie Portman, stunning!

The dresses, to die for!

Haven't seen the movie, but must!

This video is so elegant and feminine. LOVE.
Sharing from Vogue.com